Random

I cant sleep on that nite after friends of Her send a msg to me which is really unexpected. So strait away i sms Her to ask whether is true not.She said to me "just ignore it,my friend just playing around" . So i just ignore it, after awhile Her friend sms me again, so i tell Her friend,"call 'Her' to tell me personally if what u saying is true". Than Her friend say okay. After that everything is NOT okay.My head keep thinking.Keep turning round and round.But She just say just ignore Her friend and tell Her if Her friend sms me again.So things is getting weird.If this fellow can have my number, means what he said might true. That nite i try to sleep, but this thing keep me awake like a fully charge battery . Until around 5am,She suddenly sms me. She said the same thing what Her friend trying to tell me.That time my heart suddenly just stop for second.I having a presentation and exam on that day.My head suddenly so cramp , suddenly everything just turn into gray. She keep saying sorry . I just don't understand, so i ask her again.Too bad, she turn off Her phone .Tears start to flow down my eyes,i just cannot take it.It happen too sudden. And i ask her why, she never given me a answer.Maybe she did,but in a way which i dun understand.At that point,I really angry.Really really angry. Everything become really really bad.I try to make myself unconscious.I just ignore Her msg all day long and try to concentrade on my exam.And yet,She keep sms me non stop,telling me sorry and so on.

Day after, She sms me and say,"can we just forget everything". I just cant do it.It happen,my feeling really get hurt.How can i just forget it?But i still try to be normal.Everything seems to be fine until i asked her out for a movie.At that time i suddenly realize how small am i, She say is not the way i think.But when ever i call her out, she will ignore me,giving me some reason.. She promise me last few years back,She said we will go the the sk8Park one day when the school holiday and sk8 together.But when the holiday comes,she giving me some reason she cant make it. At onces,we when out together,but that day She and Her ex meet up b4 i reach there.When i saw that, everything just "BOOM" .I just don't have the mood for everything.Ya,that day we still go for a movie and hangout for awhile.After that , she urgently when back for work.She say lastmin not enough worker.So what can i say more.I when back home that day and really really sad.Everything suddenly just change.We stop contact for each other for sometime.When i think back , it really makes me realize,I'm just so not important to Her. That nite we kinda quarrel abit.She don't agree what i am thinking.

Then today, we meet up together.I join her friends.We watch movie together.It makes me even sad.She didn't even talk to me or say hi to me.I try to act nice like nothing really happen.She didnt even invite me for youthCamp,MyFriend beside my asking me "want to go,If you go i'll go" I was thinking,people never invite me also.Half way of the movie, i really feel like leaving the place.I really cannot take it,but i still finish the movie with a really really heartache condition.When i reach home, i lie down on my bed.Thinking,why should i suffer all of this? I really really try to make up my mind to just give up.I try very long ago.I fail to do so.Maybe time will heal the ache inside my heart.I hope so. =(